Friendfull vs Solo Trips
"The best trips are frequently those shared with amazing people. A different form of friendship forms on trips– trust and communication are essential, and you quickly find out how they handle things like decision making and stressful situations. You have each other’s back – experiencing highs and lows together. You may not stay in touch consistently after the trip, but you will always be connected based on your shared experience and be able to laugh later about “oh and remember that one time…?”. Having people to share the trip with often means you can go farther together – no one is solely responsible for planning everything and you have a support network. Overall, life, to me, is richer when shared with others.
The next best, and sometimes most impactful, trips are solo. When you take yourself outside of the context and influence of others, you provide the opportunity to dive deeper into yourself – a scary concept at times, but its where you grow and learn and question and ponder things you wouldn’t if surrounded by others. A purer version of yourself emerges – the one that escapes expectations and reputations and exists purely there and then. You cut the clutter, the jargon, the masks. What do you want to do? Who do you want to be? What’s stopping you? You have freedom and independence and can dictate your next move if you can be courageous enough to do so. You have new founded mental space to explore your thoughts and engage in the world around you. You are forced to be entirely independent, entirely self-sufficient. A problem emerges and you must figure it out. While often uncomfortable or lonely or even scary, solo trips push limits and I firmly believe everyone should experience a solo trip at some point in their college years. "
"I have done many little “solo” trips throughout college – but nothing too long or overnight. I lived an entire summer in Connecticut kayaking and hiking solo, but at night I returned to my cozy, welcoming bed. I would say I have done many solo outings – choosing to explore anyway despite not finding anyone to join me.
I want to travel the world. And I have been fortunate to travel much during college - most note-worthy: Italy, Nicaragua, and India. And as post-masters and job life is drawing closer, the idea of doing a solo trip is becoming more and more real – a deep longing and urge to explore this crazy beautiful chaotic planet we live on. What is it that draws me to want to go when I am happy with where I am? I want to see it all and experience life to its fullest capacity. (And yes it should be noted, we can experience deep richness of life without stepping foot in a car or plane or putting on those muddy hiking boots. There are great, wonderful adventures in the everyday - we just need to keep our eyes open to see them).
Doing a large solo travel trip is a concept I have been toying with for quite some time for several reasons:
1. Unable to find anyone to go with. A sad logistical statement of schedules and budgets not aligning. Once people start graduating and friends start jobs (and even (gasp) families!) – it becomes less of a priority for even adventure-loving people to pick up and spend a month in Southeastern Asia or on the PCT.
2. I am capable of spending long chunks of time alone. Not everyone is the same way. Don’t get me wrong - human interaction is essential to my happiness – I am a social creature. Life is meant to be experienced with others – but I am completely comfortable eating dinner by myself at a diner or wandering alone along a beach.
3. I want to have my “Eat Pray Love” moments. I want to do all those hippy dippy things like “finding myself” and learning to meditate and soul-searching and pushing my limits and experiencing joy and love and pleasure and challenges in an entirely new context.
4. I am terrified. And I want the challenge. Yes, this is a reason why I want to solo travel. There’s power in knowing that I am the only person capable of figuring out the problems when they arrive. There will be long and lonely and uncomfortable nights. Do I even have the guts to make it happen? What would my parents think? What if something goes wrong? What in the world will I learn on such an adventure?
5. Because I can. In the words of famous Anthony Bourdain about travel - “If you’re twenty-two, physically fit, hungry to learn and be better, I urge you to travel – as far and as widely as possible. Sleep on floors if you have to. Find out how other people live and eat and cook. Learn from them — wherever you go.” I am healthy. I am financially staying afloat. I am at a point in my life where I can ponder the ability to solo travel. I don’t want to miss my opportunity.
I’ve dabbled with the idea of doing a solo backpacking trip as well. A totally new kind of experience – where survival takes a whole new level. Where bears and sprained ankles and dehydration and become much scarier when alone in the woods. My biggest barriers: my guts and gear. Do I have enough experience to do it? The knowledge? The right gear? The courage?
A newish thought for me – sitting in the back of my head, as graduation draws nearer - pondering, asking that most dangerous question that likes to pop up again and again: “what if?”